a day in the life of Jenna

(please note that all times are approximate)
12:45 am - Stumble into hostel room and attempt to quietly make bed. This is made difficult by the fact that I am on the top bunk of a rickety bunk bed and am drunk. Apparently, I shook the bed enough to give Steph the spins.
12:55 am - Set three alarms on my cell phone for the morning: 6:22 am, 6:52 am, 7:32 am. I have decided I am nothing less than a true patriot because I'm getting up for the USA World Cup soccer match.
12:56 am - Pass the fuck out.
5:44 am - Wake up. Look at time. Wonder why I woke up. Notice that I somehow bunched all the blankets into a mountain on the side of the bed.
5:48 am - Decide that I have to pee really badly and need to get up soon anyway so I just get out of bed.
6:00 am - Stumble into common area and drunkenly write my dad's father's day card while watching the World Cup.
6:30 am - Eat some leftover cheeseburger and fries from the night before. Cold.
6:45 am - Stumble to post office and mail my dad's card. Head to bar I was drinking at the night before because they have beer specials during the soccer matches.
7:05 am - Enter bar and sit down. I order a pitcher of Bud Light sheepishly and the waitress laughs and says, "I love it."
7:45 am - Am starting to feel rather intoxicated and self-conscious that I am drinking an entire pitcher of beer alone before 8 in the morning. Text friends to seem less like an alcoholic.
8:30 am - Have become a huge soccer fan and am horrified by bad calls. I am starting to yell at the TV. I text Steph to see if she wants to wake up and join me and get no response.
9:00 am - Call my dad on the walk back to the hostel and rant about the soccer match. I am drunk.
9:10 am - Fall back into hostel bed and pass the fuck out.
11:00 am - Wake up still drunk. Steph has showered and is ready to greet the day. I slur at her to look at ESPN.com and make her watch video replay of the shitty soccer calls. She humors me.
11:15 am - Eat more of my cold cheeseburger and fries (with ranch).
11:30 am - Walk to quaint seaside village with shopping/food. Am starting to get hungover.
12:15 pm - Order another Bud Light to take the edge off.
12:45 pm - Roll up my jeans (which I will later regret, as I now have ridiculous lines on my shins) and pass the fuck out on some grass by the water.
2:00 pm - Start harassing Steph to amuse me.
2:30 pm - Eat clam chowder (even though it was like 80 degrees) and pound some water.
3:30 pm - Lay back down in hostel. Decide to go see Toy Story 3.
4:25 pm - Watch Toy Story 3, which is awesome. Get choked up at beginning and straight up cry at the end. Steph mocks me.
6:45 pm - Go to Petco Park and watch the Padres play. We decide to sit in the all you can eat ticket section. I am probably too excited.
7:00 pm - Consume two hot dogs with the works. And popcorn. And sprite. Try a piece of Steph's veggie dog and decide it is weird.
8:30 pm - Get one more hot dog and hoard popcorn/peanuts/water, as the all you can eat food is ending soon.
8:40 pm - Regret getting last hot dog about two bites in and stop after 1/2.
10:00 pm - Padres pull off walk-off win in 9th. Fireworks! Flames!
10:30 pm - My body hates me for what I did to it today.